Timeline

Andre Ellington gets his dreadlock long hair pwned

In football you’re supposed to wear helmets and the last thing you expect is to have your hair on the floor as if it had fallen of your head. But Andre Ellington is different and instead of tying his gotdamn long hair and disgusting dreadlocks he lets his cute locks dangle out of the helmet. Well then he gonna get his precious dreadlocks pwned by some dude named Jason.

picture of the long hair dreadlocks of Andre Ellington that were ripped from his head

Ariana Grande dayum!

ariana grande

Went to buy my dad a manly perfume and ended up buying him an aftershave

Seems like the latest trend on male grooming is covering oneself in the most expensive of perfumes and walking around all day smelling like some fruitcake, and I mean that literal because perfume companies mix all kinds of fruity smells to justify their exorbitant perfume prices.

Apparently it’s not perfume for men, it’s cologne or so Men’s Health claims. At the end of the day it’s just damn perfume folks, it is meant to make you smell nice and even make women think you are sexy. And while my father is as sexy as a can of tuna, I wanted to buy him a manly perfume, a perfume for men who want to be men without any hint of being a metrosexual. So I’m looking round for advice on perfumes and heck even cologne recommendations and I come across a barbershop forum post with reviews on perfumes for men that seem to confirm that men really are losing the battle of keeping their manhood. That barbershop forum post does recommend at least one good male cologne though so not all is lost — if you must know that male cologne worth the bucks is 1 million by Paco Rabanne — but really, why should a man spend part of his daily grooming on perfuming himself so he smells like a plastic fruit or liquid tobacco? Give me some fragrance free deodorant and I’m ready to go in terms of smelling but I do realize not all men think like me and some men do actually like wearing perfumes or colognes.

So back on the topic, I wanted to get my dad a good male cologne. I went down to the mall and tried several men perfumes of which one of them was 1 million by Paco Rabanne — and the reason why i know it’s a decent cologne for men –, however I was not sold on buying these pretty liquids because the prices for those perfumes were nearing the 100 bucks mark for a mini bottle of fragrance liquid. I’m sorry but it’s against my morals to pay so much money for some cologne that costs 3 bucks to make and that has been brainwashed by the likes of Men’s Health to be the “cologne of the year”.

So what did I end up doing at the mall then? I bought my dad three bottles of Old Spice aftershave.

The stuff the male grooming gods are made of

Instead of a perfume I bought my father this aftershave

What do men want? Simple Booooo-bs

what has been seen

50 Cent big afro hair

The saying is that this is 50 Cent’s real hair.

Big afro hair like he is pimping.

Curly hair, I wish I had some lol

50 cent afro hairstyle

To grow grow a beard or to not grow a beard, that is the beard question

Beards kick ass, we all know it and so does Chuck. But beards are always itchy, they are uncomfortable to go to sleep with and women complain about them tingling their you know what when you’re tossing some salad.

Gotta find some balance, maybe trim it and keep it short like a day’s growth? Beard trimmers are f*cking expensive and I ain’t doing it the oldschool way and trimming my beard with scissors bro. Have to give it a good think, beard or no beard? That is the beard question…

i have a beard question

Went to the barbershop for a haircut and…

I tried a new barbershop downtown, they opened the barbershop last week so I went there to get a new haircut as I have grown tired of my long hair. The barber was some hipster Norwegian my age who could hardly speak English. I tried to give the dude directions for a taper haircut with the hairline done in a fade and he ended up giving me a haircut with layers so all my hair was the same length.

I facepalmed myself when I saw the new haircut (he kept me facing away from the mirror lol). Wanted to complain but then realized this dude is probably giving haircuts and hairstyles all day long on his feet for the minimum wage so I just crossed out that barbershop from future haircuts of mine.

I’m just gonna grow my hair long again and that’ll cut — no pun intended — any hair disasters of mine.

norway barbershop